January: my dog died. unexpectedly. violently. and I was the one who found her.
March: my Papa died. expected. peacefully with a romantic twist. but difficult to watch my dad grieve and deal with jerks for family.
May: my Grandma died. expected. peacefully in her sleep. but too soon after I finally began to understand her. relate to her. proud to be like her. and painful because my Daddy was again hit with loss and had to deal with the ugly truth about his brothers.
May through August: Russel is sucked into camp life just as I really need some stability and support. but extended family came to the rescue.
September: the turning point. Skydiving. adrenaline rush. a kick in the "bum" to appreciate life and a reminder that we have to live it. and the libido boost didn't hurt either.
October: realized how much weight I gained over the past year, but not really motivated enough to do something about it.
November: normally by this time of year I am listening to Christmas music and have checked off several names on my shopping list, but I still am not really into it yet (in December).
Now: I can still feel the "funk cloud" around. but I am going to kick its "bum". I have committed to one too many things recently because the idea of them made me excited, but I am determined to see them through. I am more in love with my husband now than ever before. looking forward to our annual anniversary trip. despite knowing that I need to lose weight (mainly for health reasons although my doctors don't seem worried yet) I am becoming more comfortable with my body (for which my husband is very appreciative). and I am still pressing on. determined. confident I will win.
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